The last few days have really been hard for me and I think it’s because I’m losing myself or as Fergie would say, “I’m losing my ground.” I think that I find myself lost in everyday life that I sometimes forget about myself. It’s so DEMANDING trying to work, be a mother, a friend, go to school, and also try to find time for myself that I am losing myself. I am sure someone would say to me that this is apart of life, and I can understand that but I don’t want it to be apart of my life. I do not want to live my life knowing that I am losing myself and causing myself stress and pain, because I don’t think that’s healthy. I find myself shedding a tear sometimes because I feel like I am trapped and I can’t get out!! I wonder if it’s because I’m a loner and tend to be by myself if that is why I feel like I’m losing my ground. People around me tend to say whatever comes to their minds and I just look and smile, because I truly believe that I have lost my energy for REALLY SNAPPING ON PEOPLE!!! I just really regret the day that someone crosses me and piss me off, because there are a lot of things inside me that can potentially come out on the wrong person. I have internal battles with myself and I know I am my own worse enemy, so I really do not need the help of others who tend to want to judge me and my situation. In the mist of my battles I am losing myself and I am trying to hold on with dear life, because I know in my heart it’s going to change!! Some may look at me and think that I am some kind of SUPERWOMAN and I guess in some ways that is what I am, but on the inside I am looking to really pack up my daughter and me and just leave, and go somewhere far away and just start over. Again, I truly think that I am losing myself in life and I have to get myself back together again and modify ME!! Guess as I always tell my Ace IT’S ALL IN DUE TIME!!!!
Till next time this is my E! True Hollywood Story... Sending peace, encouragement, and blessings your way!!